I can't complain but sometimes I still do
My name is Steve and I'm a newspaper reporter and writer living in northeast Wisconsin, which is just below the armpit created by the bulk of the state and the peninsula. I don't live in the actual armpit, which is Green Bay, which is a place where fat people sit on their porches and watch traffic go by when the Packers aren't in season. I live in Appleton, a place where slightly less fat people do slightly more interesting things, like watch NASCAR, which is traffic with better camera work. I like living here 79 percent of the time. I fancy myself a deep thinker, an iconoclast, a man who can enjoy both high and low culture. Think Chuck Klosterman with a dose of Jack Nicholson from "Five Easy Pieces." However, I suspect I am not nearly as cool as I think I am. I may in fact be a dork. For example, look at how I described myself a few sentences earlier. What can I say? I'm the guy who started listening to the Clash when he was 13 not because he was reacting against the repressive Republican regime he had lived under most of his life, but because John Cusack wore a Clash T-shirt in "Say Anything..."
1 Comments:
With all your Republican bashing, you're totally going to end up on a terror watch list, dude. First off, you have a beard. Terrorists dig beards. Second, you publicly dissed Bug Light -- the patriot's brew. And I'm pretty sure you've made fun of NASCAR and Toby Keith. Well, at least I hope you have.
Second and most importantly, Fetus Boy sucks. I want to punch him in the face. I don't watch "Idol," but as I was flipping around last night, the scary gray-haired dude who looks like Greg Dulli from Afghan Whigs came on. So I stuck around ... and your boy took the stage shortly after and SUCKED the place dry. We're talking Barry Manilow levels of SUCKAGE here (Oh, hey Barry, thanks for dropping by the show. Is John Tesh in the green room?) And of course, the judges were nice to Fetus Boy because, well, he looks so darn cute and he has "moxie." Moxie? ARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! Kid should be hanging from a flagpole somewhere. God, he sucks.
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