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I can't complain but sometimes I still do

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

This man is gay?

I thought about posting about this and decided not to because I'm not big on commenting on the sexual orientations of strangers. But I just got a breathless phone call from a friend who immediately asked, "Did you hear about the gay Backstreet Boy?" So maybe people are talking about this today, thus making it blog worthy.

So Lance Bass is gay. (And he was in N'Sync, not Backstreet.) Is anybody shocked by this? I doubt it. Not because people already assumed Lance was gay but because, as my friend put it, anyone who wasn't a 14-year-old girl when "Bye, Bye, Bye" was big didn't have an opinion about the guy's sexuality one way or another. Boy bands are essentially are Ken dolls. For all their washboard stomachs and gyrating dance moves, there's nothing remotely sexual about them. And it's not like you think about puppies or ponies getting it on, either. So whether the guy likes guys or girls ultimately is irrelevant.

Still, I think it's funny that his plan to go to space was intended to divert attention from his gayness. Somebody check Neil Armstrong's CD collection for Village People and Liza sightings.

I bet this revelation helps his career in the same way keeping it a secret made it possible for N'Sync to get all that pub from the Disney Channel. It's not as if the dude was on the cover of People magazine before this happened. In all seriousness, good for him for coming out. Now all those macho dudes who love N'Sync will have to rethink their prejudices.

10 Comments:

Anonymous gavin said...

"And it's not like you think about puppies or ponies getting it on, either."

Hey, speak for yourself, Mr. Hyden.

1:37 PM  
Anonymous cheddar said...

Wait, puppies with ponies, or puppies with puppies?

4:40 PM  
Blogger Steve Hyden said...

Puppies or ponies. You are putting the "with" in there yourself, my friend.

5:28 PM  
Anonymous lori said...

i wasn't breathless, i swear.

plus, i'm proud i don't know my backstreets from my n*syncs.

for once, being retarded has made me cool.

7:43 PM  
Anonymous Nick P. said...

Here's a question for all the teenage girls that once swooned for a boy band: what is it that causes such orgasmic fandom for these group? It's like when you see old movies of the Beatles performing and you see teenage girls literally screaming and balling to be in their presence. And it was the same for the hysterical fans of the New Kids on the Block and 'N Sync and the Backstreet Boys (please forgive me for comparing the Beatles to boy bands). My theory is that this maniacal reaction in teenage girls is caused by out-of-control hormones. Confronted by cute boys singing peppy love songs in tightly choreographed dance routines, they literally don't know what to do except scream and cry. As far as teenage boys being really into pop princesses like Britney Spears or Shakira, I think it basically comes down to one thing: wanting to have sex with them. Is this essentially why teenage girls react so insanely to boy bands? Steve suggests otherwise, but I'm curious. Care to weigh in, one-time New Kids fans?

11:43 PM  
Anonymous lori said...

nick:

i was HUGE into NKOTB in the early 90s, and i must say i never once thought about boning joey-joe. i did, however, think about hanging out with him, and kissing him, and having him fall in love with me. i can't fully explain the obsession, but there's something very pure about it. these guys were cute, they made music i loved, and i wanted to know who they were. i wanted them to know who i was. i wanted them to randomnly knock on my door one afternoon and ask to use the restroom because their tour bus had broken down in front of my house. i was also 11 at the time, and i thought babies were made when men and women simply lay naked beside one another. no movement involved.

for what that's worth.

7:37 AM  
Anonymous lori said...

and here's someone else's confession:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/07/26/AR2006072601994.html

8:49 AM  
Blogger Thomas Roz said...

"i was also 11 at the time, and i thought babies were made when men and women simply lay naked beside one another. no movement involved."

that's the best thing i've ever read on a blog.

2:42 PM  
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11:03 PM  

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