Under 30

I can't complain but sometimes I still do

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Does he suck? Bono

We continue our mission of clearly defining those people, things, ideas, thoughts, actions and other nouns and verbs of questionable suckitude with rock's most polarizing frontman, Bono.

After Not Suck's bloody beatdown of Suck in the "Napoleon Dynamite" vote last week, I was looking for someone that would lead to a better debate. Thanks to this man, I think I found it. Bono might be the ultimate love 'em or hate 'em celebrity. Some people want to kiss his feet, other people want to punch his lights out. Or at least knock those stupid shades off.

I know how I feel about Bono, but I have this strange feeling (I think it's called "empathy") for the other side. So this time, I'm actually going to live up to my promise of not stating my opinion until the end. Instead, I will lay out a case for both sides and let you decide.

NOT SUCK: His band is still as good as it was when it started; he has managed to maintain the same level of rock stardom for 25 years; he is an articulate and funny spokesman for rock's elder statesmen; he has used his fame to help people less fortunate.

SUCK: His band is still as good as it was when it started -- not very; he has maintained the same level of rock stardom for 25 years by appearing in iPod commercials and sucking up to Kanye West; he is an arrogant and flatulent spokesman for rock's elder statesmen; he has used his fame to help people less fortunate -- and trick his fans into thinking he's Jesus Christ.

Don't forget to vote, and vote often. POLLS CLOSE AT NOON FRIDAY.


Blogger Krista said...

hate. him.

ugh. take the effing glasses off.

vote: sucks.

11:51 AM  
Blogger - C.H. said...

Yeah, he definitely sucks.

I have blogged about him and his sucking a few times already also. Don't get me wrong, there are worse things you could do with fame than try to help poor countries/people.

It's just that he does it in such an arrogant way. It makes me wish that I could meet him one day for the sole purpose of punching him in the face.

I just can't believe that these politicians even pay attention to him. It's absurd.

Anyway, this is sure to be a heated debate. Nice choice.

11:59 AM  
Anonymous Cheddar said...

I don't like rock music, therefore I don't like U2, therefore I don't like Bono. He sucks.

(There was no requiring logical arguments in this thing.)

12:20 PM  
Blogger Thomas Roz said...

I really need to collect my thoughts on this one, Steve. It's far too important.

12:41 PM  
Blogger Krista said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

1:03 PM  
Blogger Krista said...

I will quick justify my vote. I may have been irrational. Don't get me wrong, still hate him, but it's more than the ridiculous, goddamn sunglasses. He's arrogant. That alone is enough. Now, I'll give him credit for saving the world and whatnot, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't dance around a bit during the iPod commercial, but I'd also be lying if I said I didn't want to punch his lights out.

1:04 PM  
Anonymous mark said...

Not Suck.

I thought everyone liked Bono.

He's done incredible things and tackled important issues .. I don't care how he got there or if he's arrogant ala I don't care if bill clinton got a blow job.

I like the music too.

1:45 PM  
Blogger paul said...

Doesn't suck.

u2: Great band. Bono: great frontman. He's a passionate, articulate, sincere and engaging spokeman for a cause that desperately needs one. He has successfully brought attention to issues that otherwise don't get press attention and has made a personal investment of time, resources, and attention. The fact that he might not be deserving of holding such influence doesn't change the fact that he does and that he is damn effective at wielding it.

If he's arrogant in the process, so what? The antisocial antics of numerous bands are celebrated, yet Bono sucks because he wears goofy sunglasses? *shrug*

Is this "Does it Suck" thing just about hating mass culture? If so, isn't it silly to have a popular vote to determine it?

1:59 PM  
Blogger paul said...

On an unrelated note, check out this awesome photo of Steve here.

2:11 PM  
Anonymous Cheddar said...

Words cannot do that photo justice.

That photo is the definition of not suck.

2:21 PM  
Blogger Thomas Roz said...

Bono irritates me to no end. Heck, he irritates his own band members. That says something. As a performer, though, he's truly gifted. I own every U2 album but two ("Zooropa" and "Dismantle an Atomic Bomb"). That I chose not to buy U2's latest one shows that I'm now so distracted by Bono's Time "Man of the Year" covers and Jesse Helms meet-and-greets that I no longer look at him as frontman to a great (once great) rock 'n' roll band.

It's not even about being a celebrity and striving for nobility. I believe Bono is a good person. As was already mentioned, there are worse things you could do with fame than try and help poor people. Bono acknowledges the way he uses those connections.

Then again, I read a magazine article a few years back about an incident in Dublin where Bono and the interviewer were driving from a hotel, and Bono saw two teens on the side of the road, one wearing a U2 shirt. He pulled over his car, told them to hop in, and proceeded to spend the day with two fans while both could barely pick their jaws up from the floor. Clearly, he knows how to manipulate his image, even if the reporter was smart enough to realize the facade. Clearly, that's irritating ... as is my rambling.

"Sunday Bloody Sunday," "One" and "With or Without You." Plus, I love me some "Gloria" off "October." You've earned your pull, Bono.

Does not suck.

2:21 PM  
Anonymous mark said...

paul.. thank you for articulating an opinion i share..

most importantly, thanks for Steve picture. a gem. it's going to the fan site.


2:24 PM  
Blogger Steve Hyden said...

it looks like i weigh about 300 pounds in that photo. and dad had just dragged me out of bed, so i could not keep my eyes open, apparently.

thanks, paul. i'll be digging up your senior pic soon.

2:47 PM  
Anonymous kbl said...

Doesn't suck. Yes, he can be wildly irritating, painfully fake and insufferably holier-than-thou. People who’ve met him say he can be a self-important douche. But... He's amazing at what he does, and what he does is pretty amazing. I can understand hating him, but hating him and him sucking are two different things. I really, really hate Dave Eggers, but that doesn’t necessarily mean he sucks. Alternately, I like the music of (early) Britney Spears while recognizing that it, and she, suck(s).

I can’t always separate the art from the artist, but I like to try. And it isn’t like Bono is Roman Polanski, despite the fact that he apparently picked up some teenage hitchhikers.

And I’ll forgive a lot of the person who brought me One.

(If it turns out that Bono sucks and Dashboard Confessional & Napoleon Dynamite don’t? I think we can then all learn never to trust the results of Suck/Don’t Suck. Or most elections that involve reflecting the will of the masses, I suppose.)

This could all be boiled down to "What Thomas Roz said."

3:06 PM  
Blogger Thomas Roz said...

Anyone here familiar with "The Ben Stiller Show" skit on Bono and Lucky Clovers cereal? Priceless.

3:46 PM  
Blogger Olson said...

Not Suck.

He's at least using his arrogance and world wide celebrity to make a change. Unlike Tiger Woods or Michael Jordan who just go hermit style trying not to offend anyone in the all important quest for more money.

Music is still good too. But mostly because he doesn't just sit on his influence.

3:49 PM  
Blogger Steve Hyden said...

I'm a little surprised that nobody has made a Sony Bono joke yet.

And now, nobody can.

4:51 PM  
Blogger Steve Hyden said...

That's Sonny, not Sony, which is a popular electronics company.

4:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

what kind of name is bono anyway? sounds like a prophylactic. for that reason, i say suck.

4:59 PM  
Anonymous breanna said...

i don't know about bono, but he does do some important charity work. even if he does have more pride than a jungle baboon.

and i like U2 very much.

and for that reason, bono very much does not suck.

and paul, i'm glad we're actually agreeing on this one. oh, and i've gotta give you credit for the picture of the overturned orange couch with the dog in the purple sweater. i was hoping to put up the one your mom has in her house... hahaha...

5:09 PM  
Blogger Steve Hyden said...

Yeah, those jungle baboon bastards really need to be taken down a peg.

5:14 PM  
Anonymous lori said...

For so many reasons, all of them shallow and penetrable and maybe a little catty, I shout from the top of the Carew Tower in Cincinnati that "BBBBBBBOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOO SSSSSUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCKKS!"

And so does that fat picture of Steve. Paul, you're a cruel brother. Makes me think I should post the photo I have of the two of you (in your dorm room, I believe), which is the single most painful portait of adolescence I've ever seen. But that would make ME cruel.

6:46 PM  
Blogger Bethany K. Warner said...

Doesn't suck.
Maybe rockers shouldn't get involved in politics/current events, you say. I say, few enough other people are so go to it, Bono and U2. Their songs have intelligent lyrics and they actually practice what they preach by getting involved and trying to make sense of this world.

7:35 PM  
Anonymous Sharon said...

Well, I have to say that I agree with Paul on this one...does not suck. This time we will double our vote.

Steve, I love the picture of you and the couch.

8:55 PM  
Anonymous e4life said...

I long for a return to the days when rock stars destroyed hotel rooms and slapped their groupies with mudsharks. Enough with this humanitarian B.S. Screw the children.

Until U2 stops writing songs that include the line, "when I look at the world," I must say that Bono:


9:44 PM  
Blogger Erin said...

SUCKS. I don't even have the energy to tell you why.

(OK, so it's because he's annoying and his music gets overplayed and that hair, ugh. He can save the world a little more quietly and we'd all be better off.)

10:28 PM  
Blogger Erin said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

10:29 PM  
Blogger Erin said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

10:31 PM  
Blogger johnny said...

bono is a funny non-sucky little man.

12:16 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

'music gets overplayed' stop listening to mtv and the radio. get an ipod. listen when you want. don't hate him because someone else will pay big bucks for his music or his face... the guy does great work. much more than dashboard guy or napolean guy...

stop reading time magazine and all the other crap they put out there and maybe you won't hate him as much.

1:49 AM  
Blogger johnny said...

Bono haters suck.

4:12 AM  
Anonymous Joe said...

Arrogant rocks stars don't bother me. I can even put up with pretentious rock stars. Bono definitely has elements of both, but at least he's using his rock star powers for good.

vote: doesn't suck.

9:16 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

in the name of suck. what more, in the name of suck.

2:01 PM  
Blogger Jim Collar said...

sucks to the seventh power.

If I had my wish, Bono, Angelina Jolie, Pearl Jam and any other entertainers who think I care for a second to hear about their causes and politics could all live happily together in a third world nation without soapboxes.

Bono could feed the kids, Angelina could adopt them and Pearl Jam could spread the pro-choice word so men and women would make less of them.

Bono sucks. The Edge I can stand. He's cheesy, but he keeps his mouth shut and plays his instrument. Hey Bono, love the kids -- charity rules. But don't tell me about it.

5:53 PM  
Anonymous Sharon said...

This is interesting...do y'all think that Audrey Hepburn sucked because she was so involved with Unicef? Do you suck if you actually try to do good works because you have name recognition?

6:25 PM  
Anonymous Dave said...

i have sat by and watched closely to this debate and kinda went back and forth as to what I thought. yes, I do think Bono can get annoying -- but what celebrity doesn't? And I do think he should have his jaw wired shut every once in a while. but hey, well all talk too much sometimes.



Hello, hello, (Hola!) Dave says Bono doesn't suck.

sorry for the craptastic song/iPod commercial reference (which yes, did get annoying) ... but, you can't fault the guy for trying to do good.

His songs have rocked the world and now he is using that fame by trying to change the way the world operates and what it thinks about. whats so bad about that?

as a society, we rag on famous people all the time for not doing enough to help the less fortunate and then when someone actually does, we rag on him for being annoying.


7:35 PM  
Anonymous Sarah...the stepniece said...


I have a comment on the Bono vote
and the Steve picture.

I shall start with Bono

Bono does not suck. Even though he supports Bush greatly, he puts money toward good causes and makes awesome music. He may have stupid sunglasses, but every rock icon has something. Look at Buddy Holly, hes got those dumb glasses that everyone knows. And think about Elton John(aka the queen of england) and his weird ass stage costumes. So no dissin on the glasses homie.

And the Steve picture. LORI! IT IS THE SIBLINGS DUTY TO TEASE THE OTHERS!!! ITS NOT CRUEL! IT'S FAMILY! plus get a sense of humor. I heard you can get one on eBay. Go bid on one.

So I think in this comment
I have concluded that Bono doesn't suck
and Lori needs to get a sense of humor
Thank you for your time

Peace out,
The 14 year old.

9:27 PM  
Blogger klhp said...

Bono does not suck.

(Don't tell anyone, but I think he's kinda beautiful.)

11:06 PM  
Blogger Jim Collar said...

Hey Sharon,

Jesus said something about not letting the right hand know what the left is doing. That means Bono should donate his money without holding a damned press conference or Ipod commercial.

11:56 PM  
Blogger pcvalleyjams said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

12:43 AM  
Blogger Steve Hyden said...

Lori, I think a 14-year-old girl just picked a fight with you.

I also think there is now zero doubt that you will soon post the single ugliest picture of me ever.

Can't wait.

12:45 AM  
Anonymous markkkkkk said...

jim RE:sharon..

i think it's important he makes what he is doing public. awareness is kind of paramount when it comes to global change

12:47 AM  
Anonymous lori said...

Sarah: You are.

Steve: You are right.

EVERYONE: Prepare to see the most hideous, most awkward, most vomit-inducing photo of Steve Hyden in existence. Coming soon...

9:06 AM  
Blogger paul said...


Have fun with whatever you choose to do. I'm glad a comment from a 14 year old has rationalized behavior that you clearly wanted to do all along. Hey, I can hook you up with some pictures of my amazing neck scars from my recent surgery of you are interested in mocking me specifically. It is easy to make fun of me... I'll even help you.

I thought Steve's picture was fun, and I wasn't trying to be hurtful. I sent him a note of apology when I was worried that his own self deprecrating comment was serious. (Hey, it runs in the family... the picture comes from my Dad's blog entry where he makes his own self-deprecating comments). You are the only person who has echoed Steve's comments or sought to be cruel.

Or maybe Sarah can show me where to find a sense of humor from Ebay.

Bono still doesn't suck, by the way.

11:44 AM  
Anonymous lori said...

paul: are you serious? because i'm not.

12:09 PM  
Anonymous lori said...

also, and not to sound sappy or anything, i happen to think steve is one of the most wonderful people i know. i completely love and adore him, and i know he can take a little abuse -- if he didn't want me to post The Photo, i wouldn't.

but please tell me you're joking. then i can go back to being fake-mean.

12:22 PM  
Blogger Steve Hyden said...

aw, lori. i'm not wonderful. that's your upper lip.

12:26 PM  

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